Wednesday, December 22, 2010

How to Avoid Packing on those Extra Holiday Pounds

I love pigging out on the holidays. It just feels so right. And you really should treat yourself. Eating is probably what I enjoy most about the holiday season (I really wish people ate stuffing year round) and if you're reading my blog, it's probably what you most enjoy as well. Friends and family are great too, but really, who needs them when you got your best friend food dressed up nicely in front of you at the holiday table.

Of course hanging out with your best buddy can have negative consequences. Especially during holiday time, he's always there, looking up at you from the holiday table, begging you to pig out. And so I've devised an exercise plan that tempers the negative effects of big-time holiday grubbin.

It's called the pasta plan. All you have to do is make large quantities of pasta and knead for 30 minutes a day if your just starting out, or 45 minutes for advanced gym, I mean "kitchen rats." I recently put my grandma on the plan and she's gone from flab to fab in JUST TWO WEEKS! Ya see, the workout really tones the arms, so if you're feelin a little flabby back there, but really want to wear that sleeveless for New Year's, START NOW!


My plan will cut through those Christmas cake calories from like cutlery in the kitchen. E-mail me now and receive fresh pasta dough delivered to your door. This workout is guaranteed to work almost as well as the shake weight. So if you try the program, send me some before and after pictures to put up on the site.

But seriously, I'm not tryna get sued here. Talk to you doctor before engaging in any serious workout plan like this.

5 comments:

Teddy Devico said...

Ratio's recipe???

craigkite said...

I found that the Parisian Workout plan worked well when in large cities. When trying to create a meal, go to the store, ON FOOT, and only settle for the best. If you do it right, you will end up at the green grocer, the baker, the butcher, several small "arab" markets to get all the ingredients for a simple pasta and ragu. Don't forget to stop for a bottle of wine. After walking 6 miles to assemble all the things you need, drink liberally from the first bottle of wine as you prepare the meal. Eat the meal and drink the second bottle of wine with dinner companions. It is not a weight loss regimen as much as it insures a "zero sum" gain in weight. Repeat daily. Merry Christmas, Nick. Santa brought Wharton early, the rest is just savoring the after-glow.

Anonymous said...

you should loook into the paleo diet, or the book the paleo solution by robb wolf
Merry Christmas!!!

Lisa said...

Hahaha I knew that pasta was your specialty, but really? Jokes, I love this Nick. I just think that my suggestions might keep of the holiday weight gain more successfully..

Nick N said...

teddy 3-1 flour to egg i believe

craig--yes that was all i could ask for

lisa--i disagree considering your plan (moderation) is impossible during the holiday season